Never Say Never, Oooh Yeah!

YouTube won't let us embed this one, but you can see it at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJCQZW_FdLY


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Why We Watch...

I distinctly remember the beginning of my relationship with professional wrestling. I was taking advantage of the opportunity that having a babysitter gives you. Long past my bedtime, I was sitting on the couch in my pajamas. With a tootsie pop in my mouth, I flipped the channel to Saturday Night's Main Event. I saw Hulk Hogan and Randy "Macho Man" Savage and it was as if He-Man had become real. The fuse was ignited that night that would eventually make the MegaPowers explode at that year's WrestleMania. During a match with the Twin Towers, Savage was tossed violently into Elizabeth. Hogan went to the back to help her, leaving Savage alone to face Akeem and the Bossman. I thought back then that if I only had a few minutes with Hogan and Savage I could help them squash their beef. Twenty years later, I still feel that way.


Sooner than later I found the National Wrestling Alliance/World Championship Wrestling on TV. I remember being amazed watching an I Quit match between Terry Funk and Ric Flair on free TV at the Clash of the Champions.

I loved the main events, but I always had an eye towards the midcard. It always seemed to be the case that I would find a cool heel to enjoy just up until they turned him babyface and the whole world loved him. Examples of this were Shawn Michaels and The Rock. About the only heel that didn't lose something when he became top mainstream babyface was John Cena, and that's cause half the fans still hated him always.

There is something special about feeling ownership of a wrestler, and I'd argue that that is why we watch. Remembering Bret Hart's days in the Hart Foundation or Steve Austin's days in the Dangerous Alliance make it that much sweeter when they meet as major stars at WrestleMania 13.

Today I look at Shelton Benjamin and Elijah Burke with the same anticipation I have previously looked at Brian Pillman, Randy Orton, Buff Bagwell, and Droz with. Of course sometimes it works out, and sometimes it doesn't.

Still, it's hard not to be cynical when you can think fondly on the old days and imagine Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair, Randy Savage, Sting, The Ultimate Warrior, Rick Rude, Vader, Jake Roberts, Arn Anderson, Ted Dibiase, and others at their peak.

It's also difficult to remember tag teams like Demolition, the Road Warriors, The Rockers, Doom, The Skyscrapers, the Midnight Express, and so many more and not long for them.

Even the days when WCCW, USWA, or GWF would come on ESPN on Wednesday afternoons bring some nostalgia.

By comparison when you compare today's wrestling atmosphere to all the memories of the past 20 years, it just doesn't compare. Still, we watch…

We watch because we are waiting for the next big breakthrough. Will it be Mr. Kennedy? Will it be Jeff Hardy? Only time will tell.

We watch because some of those larger than life characters we remember are still around like the Undertaker and Shawn Michaels, and they have been intertwined with those we've learned to care about in the meantime like Edge, Triple H, and Rey Mysterio.

We watch because even though we aren't likely to see a big interesting defection the way we did during the old WCW/WWE days, we can still mark out months after waiting for Chris Jericho to return on TV, because that moment when he does will undoubtedly be incredible.

We watch because Cody Rhodes and DH Hart keep us grounded and remind us where we came from. We watch because new generation stars like AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels show us where we are going.

We watch because every week Jay Lethal or Santino Marella is going to do that little something extra that makes us smile.

No matter how disillusioned we get with what wrestling is and no matter how much better we think it could be, we watch.

Now I am certainly not going to sit in any bleachers and cry that it's still real to me, damnit. I am not sure that it ever was real to me. It was larger than life.

A few weeks ago I sat at a local Indy show in the bleachers about to cry because the first half of the show was incredibly bad. It picked up though, and by the end I felt I had gotten my money's worth.

In a time where the most newsworthy wrestling happenings involved Candice Michelle falling on her face, I struggle to write, but I refuse to just dump on the product.

Is it easy to come up with anti-WWE and anti-TNA banter? Of course. Right now I probably like wrestling less than I have at any point in the past 20 years, but still I watch.

Professional wrestling seems to have cast a weird spell over thousands. It's one that those who aren't under will never understand. Those of use who are don't even get it sometimes.

Maybe I will never get the wrestling show I wish for until I get to heaven. I assume that at 25 years old, by the time I get there all my favorites will be there with me.

Rest In Peace to all the former warriors of the squared circle. Your contributions are why we are here today. You are fondly remembered and greatly missed.

The Outcast, the Legend, the Wolf is back for another opinionated commentary:

When I first read the teaser to your current column, I thought that Vince had fired the fans again, but then I wondered, how can you fire someone that you haven't paid, have constantly berated for being wrong, whom you've constantly given one thing when they've been asking for something completely different, who have seen your ass more times than they've seen Jenna Haze's (and seeing as most of the core fans are teenage boys with internet service, that's a lot of times!) and with everything that you've done they keep coming back for more as if the cookies on this side of the fence are better.

But since the column isn't about US getting fired, I'll talk about the guys that you mention while I keep checking the mail box for that check from Vince (hell, with all the ideas that he's stolen from the internet, I'm shocked that he hasn't sent out a check, and that he keeps shutting down e-feds. they're a gold mine to him!)

Seeing Teddy Hart get the axe is SOOOOOOOOOOO Shocking to me (did I lay on the sarcasm enough? Ya think so? Ok, moving on) why do people keep signing this guy? (quick check on the last name and ok, I guess we know!) Ya think if Kid Kash were Kid Hart that he'd get that many chances? Exactly. I say, let the guy rot in the independents until he gets his desire, energy, and a respect for the business that he is riding the coattails of. If he ever grows up and stops using his name as a springboard then things might turn up better. If he does not, then he'll be the worst Hart ever (Including Bruce. C'mon, he might have been all right in the ring, but he had the personality of a cheese-it!).

To Ryan O'Reilly and Krissy Vaine I have this to say: HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! You two are the dumbest mutha f*ckas on the planet! You wait until you get called up to leave the company? If you two are really in love, suck it up (once again this is a FAMILY show, so minds out of the gutter) and deal with it. You obviously don't care about the business if you are ready to leave the biggest company around so that you can be close to each other. Hell, one Sunday a month you'll be in the same building, and that right there is more than I see my wife sometimes AND WE LIVE TOGETHER! Go to TNA where you'll be two more people who don't get any face time and wonder why you chose love over the passion for the business that brought you both together. See what happens if you two don't last. You won't get another chance that easily!

As far as Daivari is concerned, the guy lasted longer than I ever expected one they bailed out on the whole Hassan thing (although if they put them on Raw and run with it, they would've been KILLER heels) he had a decent run, made what I'm sure is a decent amount of money and I'm sure had a blast for the most part living his dream (unlike Hollywood Hassan who seemed to only want fame!) Good Luck to him, although he'll need a little bit of a gimmick change.

Now for the release you've all been waiting for me to comment on, King BOOKA And Queen Sharmell! For someone who gave everything he had for the last zillion years or so, did everything that he was asked since he's been apart of the WWEmpire, they treated him like crap the entire time, and he didn't deserve it! Should he get a title run on his way out of the door? No, but a nice send off would be better than "The WWE has come to terms with..." It's insulting to him and anyone who is a fan of his. But then again, something tells me that if Shane pissed off Vince enough (We all know that Steph couldn't possibly piss him off, so it'll have to be Shane) then the only thing we'd see is "The WWE has come to terms with the contractual release of one Shane O' Mac. We wish him well in all future endeavors." All kidding aside, if Book wasn't so closely linked to WCW his send off would be much more celebrated, no matter what. Just look at how many times Hogan's gotten the warm send off, and Vince HATES him now! Not that Book was ever at Hogan or Flair levels, but you get the idea. All in all, I hope that TNA gives him a short, midcard send off for a couple of months, and he beats someone like Christian Cage or Scott Steiner in his "final" "big two/three/four" match.

Then again, knowing TNA, they'll sign him and (Points thumbs at himself) R...V...D! And recreate the most misused and misguided tag teams in the history of wrestling. RVD and Booker should've never been a team. That's almost as dumb as X-Pac and Kane!

I agree Wolf. X-Pac and Kane were a horrible tag team. Here, watch the greatest tag team of all time in the match that made me a wrestling fan.





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The Misadventures of Those Zany Poffo's

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It's All About the Wrestling: Double J, The Macho Man, Showcasing and Sacrifice

One of the great things about being a fan is that we can change our mind when the wind blows. A few weeks ago I wrote an article entitled “Two Words, One Man”, which heralded the dreaded return of Jeff Jarrett. The entire article was about how I despised him. My hatred for him was not born out of his being a heel character because I have never liked Jeff Jarrett. That did not change when he returned from his self-imposed hiatus to become the fifth member of Team Angle at the TNA Lockdown pay-per-view. That did not change when he gift-wrapped a title shot for Sting at the Lockdown pay-per-view. It did not even change when he cut a heart felt in ring promo after Lockdown. No, I hated Jeff Jarrett but something happened and now I can’t help but like the guy.

Sure his storyline for the upcoming Sacrifice pay-per-view is a little weak but it is good to see Jarrett helping to push to promising young guys, Robert Roode and Eric Young, instead of pushing himself. Double J’s tenure with TNA has been pretty much been Jarrett himself pushing the Jeff Jarrett agenda. This new willingness to help make the overall product better is something that can be respected and appreciated. And boy was that guitar shot to Ms. Brooks sweet.

While Jeff Jarrett has a long history in both TNA and wrestling in general, one young TNA star doesn’t have any legacy to pull off of so he has adopted a fantastic gimmick, all the while putting on a tribute to one of the best wrestlers ever. I am speaking about Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal. Lethal is quite the promising young star and has recently been highlighted in TNA’s X-Division because of his new Macho Man impersonation. I’ve heard many people complaining about the gimmick, calling it stupid and the like, but really the gimmick was stupid when the great Randy Savage did it.

My only complaint with Lethal is that he doesn’t pull off the flying elbow drop quite as well as Savage did. The real Macho Man seemed to be able to suspend himself in mid-air as he came in to drop the elbow, an even more impressive feat when you look at his size. Lethal though is much, much smaller, yet he seems to fly twice as fast towards his awaiting prey. Regardless with a little more work, and maybe a valet, Lethal could really take off with this gimmick. It’s nice to see TNA showcasing some of their young talent.

Black Machismo though isn’t the only one TNA should be showcasing, they should be featuring their X-Division more and not in goofy gimmick matches that make little to no sense either. What TNA needs are more matches like the Alex Shelley/Chris Sabin vs. Black Machismo/Sonjay Dutt tag match from the last Impact. From the fantastic teamwork to the insane moves, this match had it all. It had everything wrestling fans truly want, because it was real wrestling. If TNA wants to bring in more fans they need to showcase these types of matches on a more frequent basis.

Recently Brother Ray (of Team 3D or the Dudleys, take your pick) said that TNA seemed to be trying to hard and should maybe take a “less is more” approach. I have to totally agree with him. In the recent months TNA has been trying to fit as many of their stars on Impact, in the short amount of time they are allotted each week. Not enough story and not enough wrestling equals a less appealing overall product. If TNA could give us a tag match like the one from this past Impact, the product as a whole would be better for it

If the overall product is better, the buy rate for their pay-per-views will be better and that is where TNA needs to make up ground. Sure they don’t have the install base that WWE has but because of this they need to up the percentage of people who watch their product and also buy their pay-per-views. The upcoming Sacrifice pay-per-view should be a something good for those that do buy TNA pay-per-views though.

This Sunday (Mother’s Day), TNA will put on the Sacrifice pay-per-view. All three championships will be on the line. Unfortunately all three championship matches will be three way dances so TNA will be flexing their gimmick muscle yet again. The X-Division championship will be up for grabs as Chris Sabin defends his title against both Jay “Black Machismo” Lethal and Sonjay Dutt. The NWA tag titles will be on the line as current champs, Team 3D battle against former champs LAX and the dysfunctional team of Scott Steiner and Tomko. While Christian Cage must defend his world championship against both Kurt Angle and the Icon, Sting. The most interesting match to me though is the mid-card bought between AJ Styles and Samoa Joe. Both these guys exemplify what TNA is striving to be and I expect this match to be the best of the night.

As always you can e-mail me with your questions, comments and flames at pwp.chris@gmail.com. I’ll catch you next week with a score sheet for Sacrifice and another It’s All About the Wrestling. More on This Story...

Who Krazier than Kanyon? Nobody!

Right before my last post, the self-proclaimed "King of Kontroversy" Chris Kanyon was part of an exclusive interview that was supposed to be all the rage. Funny how many people are throwing around the word controversy, nowadays. How is this for some controversy: The Rise and Fall of Kanyon!

Chris Kanyon first caught my eye as a part of the Men at Work tag team, wrestling frequently with partner Mark Starr on WCW Saturday Night. He would go on to portray the Ultra-Sweet Mortis, and the Much Less Sweet Positively Kanyon. He managed to be one of the more entertaining aspects of an abysmal WCW invasion of the WWE years later, but interspersed with every bit of Kanyon goodness (Being an offensive innovator, his triad team with Dallas Page and Bam Bam Bigelow)was a moment that overshadowed it (The Villano IV Incident, Being thrown off the triple cage).< br />
Much like I said about Bret Hart when I wrote the article titled "Bret Screwed Bret" for this site in September, I will let the history books decide Chris Kanyon's legacy in professional wrestling. In his interview, Kanyon supposedly "dropped a bombshell" that Bret was in on it the whole time. This should be major wrestling news, right?

Well, perhaps it could have been. Unfortunately Kanyon was taking a downward spiral. Now, Kanyon is arguably 3rd on the list for craziest wrestler behind Ultimate "Warrior Warrior" Warrior and my favorite wrestler of all time, "Macho Man" Randy Savage. I mean, Kanyon said himself that reporters didn't believe he'd really be on Stern. Why didn't they believe it? Cause Kanyon went Krazy!

Over this past summer Kanyon has come out to the wrestling community, both as a character and as a person. Hey, I'm cool. I have no problem with gay people. Kanyon then accused WWE of firing him based on his sexual preference. Ric Flair and others have publicly disputed the claim, which Kanyon blows off as them just toeing the company line. However, with the WWE having Sylvan still under contract, and having had Pat Patterson in a position of great power in the company, these accusations are a bit hard to believe.

I am not sure what Kanyon is thinking when he shows up at a WWE House show to rebel rouse. Kanyon drew the ire of Triple H amongst others, and drew scrutiny from a great number of WWE fans as he stormed to the ring. Just when you thought the guy was loopy as hell, he breaks the news that Bret was in on the Montreal Screwjob, and some have the audacity to say, "Don't believe it, listen to the interview!"

Well I am sorry, but regardless of whether it is true or not, one of the biggest wrestling controversies ever will not rest with me on Chris Kanyon's word alone. Was Bret working Kanyon? Was Kanyon working us? Who knows?

It seems that for a few months at the end of the summer, Kanyon would do or say anything to get a job with the WWE. I think that the Mortis gimmick could still make some money, and Kanyon's in ring work could still be greatly appreciated by today's fans. Unfortunately, I think Kanyon pretty much made sure we'll never see it in the WWE. I wish Kanyon all the best. Hopefully when I remember the wrestler, I won't worry about any of this B.S. publicity, and just remember him as a true talent.

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From the Vault: The Flair/Foley Nightmare

8/01/06: Mick Foley has the creative leeway to say pretty much whatever he wants, as evidenced by his promo a few years ago where if you don't hold a title in the WWE, there is something wrong with you, said in ring on Raw.

Foley's current promo's do irreversable career damage to Flair. Flair doesn't get less old, broke down, or washed up when this feud is over.

The problem?

Flair is the babyface.

Foley is putting himself back over hard at the expense of the angle and at the expense of what's left of Flair's career. Why does this make him the best promo guy ever?

Foley has had some entertaining nights on the stick, I will not deny. However, to call him the best of all time is irresponsible. You think Foley is the only one that can come up with good shit to say nowadays? No. He's just one of the only ones left with the ok to say it.

When he essentially shot on Flair, Flair was left in the ring like a wounded dog. The next week, Foley used that vulnerability against Flair. Why was Flair only able to come up with Fat Boy? I dunno that he had any idea the verbal assault that he was about to receive.

And to be honest, half of wrestling fans are not internet smarks. Just because Foley's book is a best seller doesn't mean every wrestling fan read it. I know guys that go to WWE shows TODAY that think they will see Austin and the Rock.

Shoot promos get over with a certain audience, but because you are allowed to make them and it satiates the Internet Wrestling Community, that doesn't make you a great talker.

Great talkers are the guys that used the stick to get them somewhere in the business.

Hogan
Flair
HBK
Austin
The Rock
Triple H

Hell, then you had the guys that said absolutely nothing that ever made sense, but people listened:

Warrior
Savage
Sid
Vader
Dusty Rhodes

Then on top of that, you have the guys that could just flat out talk. Talk about wrestling, talk about matches, and make you care.

Rick Rude
Jake Roberts
Ted Dibiase
Curt Hennig

Then you had the managers:

Cornette
Heenan

Who did more to get the story and the emotion where it needed to be than those guys?

I think Foley stomps on his ability to cut promos every week nowadays, because he cut some of the best ever, but now he is simply a patsy of the internet, and in every promo he cuts, I hear him begging for the internet's approval. Foley has never had any self-esteem in the business, because he knows deep down that his stunts did get him to the top.

He is truly one of the all time greats, but the more he begs for our acceptance, the more he brings himself off the pedestal and back on our level.

I think that it's a telling sign for the current state of the product when last night's verbal showdown between Flair and Foley is so critically acclaimed.

Foley again flip-flops and puts under Flair. Flair is incoherent and babbly. I much prefer the limousine riding, jet flying cocky son of a bitch to this crazy heart attack having old man.

It seems when Flair and Foley and Funk for that matter are out there, they have a general outline, but ALWAYS forget where the hell they are going. Flair will start yelling and screaming just to make sure someone is saying something. Foley appears to be waiting for the cue that never comes. Finally Flair remembers, oh Melina.

That sets off the Foley family man comments 5 minutes after they should have originally come.

Don't get me wrong, they are two of the best. I mean that. I just don't see last night as the magic moment that many others seem to.

I think they are two men who believe their own hype. Foley is tearing down Flair's legacy, but Flair is doing business and actually building Foley's further.

I am happy that they are getting fans into their future encounter, but am worried when the talent that the WWE actually needs to propel them into the future is losing time to very long and often multiple promo segments between Flair and Foley.

These aren't classic promos by old standards. They are just way above the low bar set by current superstars.

The fact that Foley ever referred to anyone in the industry as an "imaginary badass" exposes the business. It was cool to hear Flair tout legends that normally don't get their due on WWE TV, but that a good promo does not make.

We all will have our differing opinions. My personal opinion is that if this promo is at any other time when the business is up, and if any of those other great talkers we mentioned are anywhere insight, we look at this as being long, unfocused, and probably a 6 or 7 out of 10.

At points, Flair seemed like a deer in the headlights. Luckily he has his crazy old man act to fall back on.

At one time, diamonds were forever, and so was Ric Flair. This program with Foley has shown that perhaps Flair's time is running short. More on This Story...